Thursday, February 28, 2008

who's your friend?

I have this really questionable guy in a shakey circumstance I want you to meet..

Friday, February 22, 2008

so gay

matt: whats the name of the resort?
Gretchen: Tradewinds
Gretchen: Island Resort
matt: thanks
matt: is it triple bunking?
Gretchen: yes
matt: ahhg
matt: so gay


Hi Matt, 1 person signed your guestbook yesterday! Can you guess who they are? Find out who's thinking of you.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

this story's not finished

(6:41:03 PM) Joe : yo
(6:42:31 PM) matt: hey
(6:42:50 PM) matt: are you going to florida?
(6:43:10 PM) Joe : no
(6:44:17 PM) matt: my dog is too sick for me too leave
(6:44:53 PM) matt: weirdest thing- I made a poultice of garlic and green tea to put in her ear
(6:44:59 PM) Joe : wow that is weird
(6:45:02 PM) matt: and she ate
(6:45:05 PM) matt: it
(6:45:12 PM) Joe : she ate the poultice?
(6:45:19 PM) matt: fucking goat
(6:46:06 PM) matt: had a rubber band, 6 cloves of garlic and two tea bags with staples
(6:46:15 PM) matt: and 4 inches of tshirt
(6:46:25 PM) Joe : that is bizzare
(6:46:34 PM) Joe : is she sick from the poultice now too?
(6:46:51 PM) matt: she's gonna get woozy like a heroin smuggler
(6:47:11 PM) matt: she's sleeping now
(6:47:22 PM) Joe : my wife just laughed extremely loud at that
(6:47:31 PM) Joe : a lot louder than i expected i have to say
(6:48:10 PM) matt: hope it works from the inside
(6:48:20 PM) Joe : yea
(6:48:52 PM) matt: gonna poop a toxidant beanbag
(6:48:57 PM) Joe : gahaha
(6:49:05 PM) Joe : are people leaving for florida friday morning
(6:49:13 PM) matt: it's at night
(6:49:18 PM) Joe : ah ok
(6:49:22 PM) Joe : oh why did you make the poultice again
(6:49:26 PM) Joe : my wife wants to understand
(6:49:46 PM) matt: if you put it in the ear- it will suck out toxins and kill bacteria
(6:49:55 PM) Joe : oh gotcha
(6:50:15 PM) Joe : she just laughed out loud again and hit her head on her desk
(6:50:16 PM) matt: the antibotics are not working
(6:50:39 PM) matt: cause she thinks I'm nuts?
(6:50:53 PM) Joe : i think it's just the combination of everything
(6:51:08 PM) matt: it's also comforting for the dog- cause the ear is inflamed right now
(6:51:24 PM) matt: it wasn't small either
(6:51:34 PM) matt: size of a baby's foot
(6:51:45 PM) matt: which is probably what she thought it was
(6:53:40 PM) Joe : haha
(6:54:04 PM) matt: really run down by it all
(6:54:55 PM) Joe : very needy dog

sad monday twofer

there's an insane shot of sharon stone at the 4:00ish min mark.

Molly Tuttle

Sunday, February 17, 2008

have you been injured in an atv accident?

You know you stayed up too late when that commercial comes on.
Or wait- I just heard something related to purchasing a cd with this gem thought- 'My god is an awesome god'.
I need THAT!
Cause my god is weak and inefectual and needs constant re-inforcement.
Oh- and he has the luck of a 'payday' lottery player.
I might need a new god.
To Do list moment.

nuff said..

includes email

Me: brains programmed for more serious things than IO
Dawn: ?
Me: geek for Input/Output
Me: how's your MATT translator working?
Dawn: apparently in failure mode this evening
Me: I can upgrade it if you get the MATT GOLD membership
Dawn: oh, i think i'm plum out of funds for the GOLD
Me: includes email

he who is without you in this season is worthless

stumbled on this beauty-

Truly, in the season of spring
Stands beneath the blossoming tree
sweet Juliana with her sister.

Sweet love!

He who is without you in this season
Is worthless.

Behold the trees bloom,

Birds are singing lustily;
Among them, the girls are cooling off.

Sweet love!

He who is without you in this season
Is worthless.

Behold the lilies bloom,

And throngs of virgins give
songs to the Most High God of gods.

Sweet love!

He who is without you in this season
Is worthless.
If I could hold the girl I love
In the forest under the leaves,
I would kiss her with joy.

Sweet love!

He who is without you in this season
Is worthless.

(carmina burana)
holding a girl in the forest under the leaves?

bonus vid

bring it on

(Kaba Modern)
Is it too late to start my own dance crew?

I also watch the National Cheerleading Finals and the Drum Core International Championship.
However, figure skating bores me.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Friday, February 15, 2008

classmates (loser)

Me: should I spend $5 dolars to see what loser signed my guestbook?
Me: does that make me a worse loser
Dawn: the latter
Me: questions!
Dawn: but its only cinco doll hairs ... and i'd likely be the loser to check it
Me: my class is chock full of divorcee's by now
Me: it's SO tempting
Dawn: maybe there's a hot momma wanting to hook up
Me: I can name a few..

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

this basement isn't big enough for our love

Craigs List Post 'Preview' (posting tomorrow)- HAPPY VALENTINES!!!

"This basement isn't big enough to hold our love"

Cause we're like that- two people together, whose love makes cinder blocks buckle.
Paneling weak.
Wall to wall carpet is no match for our passion. We need fields of mold resistant industrial grade sea foam green shag carpet to contain us.
The wall trophies aren't safe with passion this intense!
To toss you in the air, till your head hits a ceiling tile and then, back into my waiting arms.
Je t'adore!
I want to throw you down on the shellacked driftwood coffee table and devour you.
The flickering light off your body from the electric fireplace is truly captivating.
I don't know whether to consume you or smother you to put the flames out!
You're sweating- It's hot down here, let me make you a nice cool 'tiger milk' pina colada from the tiki bar. Meow!
Like that? Here, let me wipe that. You have a mustache.
That noise? Wait, my mom's trying to tell me something through the heating vent.
Oh, I think she's saying 'I mell toke' or wait, maybe 'I smell smoke'?. You're gonna have to put that 'More' cigarette out.
Thanks, you can smoke if you blow it through the crack in the casement window Umm.
Why don't we move over to the plush sectional velour sofa?
Yeah? You like?
Let me straighten out that cushion for you- there, aren't we comfy now?
You know your eyes look like Karen Black's in this light. I'm sure You've heard that before.
No? Well they do.
Wait- I'm sorry, I think my watch is caught on your gold lame' dress.
Let me take that off...

(inspired by a friend)

winter carnival

engraving reads [ "To 1st Lt. F. Scott Fitzgerald
65th Infantry
Camp Sheridan

Montgomery, Ala" ]

Dartmouth's winter carnival was last weekend. I still remember the movie 'Winter Carnival' (1939) from when I saw it once at around age 12. I had no idea it was connected to F. Scott Fitzgerald untill years later. I still have this fuzzy romantic notion of the movie. Big fur (racoon?) coats and sipping whiskey. Party goers sking down the hill holding candles. I haven't seen it since that first time and I'm sure my memory of it is all fuzzy.

From an NYT travel piece-

"It was Fitzgerald's latest attempt at a professional comeback. It had been five hard years since the publication of Tender Is the Night, and he had spent them battling alcoholism, attempting -- and largely failing -- to jump start a screenwriting career, and occasionally writing self-lacerating confessionals for Esquire magazine.

By the time the pair disembarked from the Winter Carnival Special train from New York, Fitzgerald had already been drunk for about 24 hours, according to Mr. Schulberg. Unaware of the author's alcoholism, Mr. Schulberg's father had presented the travelers with two bottles of Mumm Champagne for their flight from Burbank. In New York, Fitzgerald had snuck out to a bar. And somehow, Mr. Schulberg recalled during a phone interview last month, Fitzgerald was able to procure liquor on the train as well. During the whole visit, Fitzgerald maintained a constant state of unproductive inebriation, much to the dismay of Wanger, who attended the festivities as well.

Walter Wanger had arranged for the head of the English department and some of the top people there to meet with us and hear our projection of story lines for the film, Mr. Schulberg said. Both of us looked disreputable. I don't think, honestly, we'd changed our clothes since we'd left the airplane. And on top of all the other drinking, a favorite sociology professor of mine was a huge fan of Fitzgerald's, and so to celebrate, at a moment when I was trying to taper Scott off, he came to the room with a bottle of whiskey and it all started all over again."

Monday, February 11, 2008

how to make a golem (difficulty: challenging)

The Hebrew golem is a silent creature in the shape of a man used by Jewish mystics to carry out menial tasks. The most famous golem in folklore was created by Rabbi Yehuda (Judah) Loew ben Bezalel, Maharal of Prague, to defend the Jews of Prague's ghetto from attack. Here's how to make a golem.
Difficulty: Challenging
Things You'll Need
• "Sefer HaYetzera," the Kabbalistic Book of Formation
• Clay or mud
• Stylus (optional)
• Parchment with God's name (optional)
Step One
Obtain a large quantity of soil or clay.
Step Two
Knead the clay into a figure resembling a man. Leave the figure imperfect, because only God can make things perfectly.
Step Three
Impart the name of God onto the golem in one of several ways: Walk or dance around it saying letters from the Jewish alphabet that form the secret name of God, engrave the Hebrew letters for the word "truth" on its forehead or attach a parchment with God's name onto the golem's arm or mouth.
Step Four
Instruct the golem to perform a desired task. Give orders carefully, because golems will interpret orders given to them literally.
Step Five
Disable the golem by reversing the procedure used to create it: Walk or dance around it backwards speaking God's name backward, remove the first letter from the word for truth to make the word for "death" or remove the parchment from its mouth or arm.
Tips & Warnings
• While all golems are strong, some have additional powers. Maharal Loew's golem supposedly could become invisible, deliver a heated touch and use the Maharal's walking stick to summon the dead.
• Jewish golem folklore inspired Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein," Carel Kapek's "RUR" and also the robot Gort from the movie "The Day The Earth Stood Still."
• While most golems are incapable of disobeying their creator, some golems in folklore can do so, particularly those that increase in size the longer they are activated. Rabbi Eliyahu of Chelm supposedly had a golem that grew so large, the rabbi had to resort to trickery to kill it, at which point it fell on the rabbi and crushed him.
(from a really stupid site

Wednesday, February 6, 2008


(11:08:27 AM) mdonohue: thats one nerdy blog
(11:15:23 AM) jmisra: back to cute overload
(11:15:57 AM) jmisra: i got a bill from google adwords this month and i was really confused, forgot i even set that up
(11:16:08 AM) jmisra: 6,461,008 impressions = 573 clicks
(11:16:26 AM) mdonohue: a bill
(11:16:38 AM) jmisra: yeah i have advertised
(11:16:48 AM) jmisra: i set it up as an experiment a long while ago
(11:16:54 AM) mdonohue: whats the keyword
(11:17:00 AM) jmisra: a lot of keywords
(11:17:01 AM) mdonohue: kittens
(11:17:26 AM) jmisra: trying to see which keywords are working best
(11:17:41 AM) mdonohue: ass butter
(11:17:41 AM) jmisra: hmm it's mostly 'content targeting' not keywords
(11:17:44 AM) jmisra: haha
(11:17:49 AM) jmisra: ass butter isn't working out that well
(11:17:53 AM) mdonohue: no?
(11:18:02 AM) jmisra: freedownloads is a winner

Monday, February 4, 2008

sad monday twofer

kate walsh + micah p hinson


(ny fashion)


Eric Wilson needs no convincing that sadness has a purpose. In his "Against Happiness," he trots out criticisms of the mindless pursuit of contentment that philosophers and artists have raised throughout history—including that, as Flaubert said, to be chronically happy one must also be stupid. Less snarkily, Wilson argues that only by experiencing sadness can we experience the fullness of the human condition. While careful not to extol depression—which is marked not only by chronic sadness but also by apathy, lethargy and an increased risk of suicide—he praises melancholia for generating "a turbulence of heart that results in an active questioning of the status quo, a perpetual longing to create new ways of being and seeing." This is not romantic claptrap. Studies show that when you are in a negative mood, says Diener, "you become more analytical, more critical and more innovative. You need negative emotions, including sadness, to direct your thinking." Abraham Lincoln was not hobbled by his dark moods bordering on depression, and Beethoven composed his later works in a melancholic funk. Vincent van Gogh, Emily Dickinson and other artistic geniuses saw the world through a glass darkly. The creator of "Peanuts," Charles M. Schulz, was known for his gloom, while Woody Allen plumbs existential melancholia for his films, and Patti Smith and Fiona Apple do so for their music.

mean (missed connections)

MCA "first friday" upstairs-- where'd you go? - w4m - 26

Reply to:
Date: 2008-02-03, 2:32PM CST

You and your friend came up and talked to me and my friend, who were leaning against the wall near the bar upstairs.
I promptly forgot your name, but your friends name was Patrick. Anyhow, you asked me some standard questions about me
and you answered some about you. We both have natural dishwater blond hair, but I dye mine red.
You threw away the plate I was holding..

..put a cigarette out in my drink and bounced my head off the cinder blocks.

JURY DUTY TODAY - m4m - 36

Reply to:
Date: 2008-02-04, 3:30PM CST

Hey man - you were in court today looking totally hot in your jeans, white tee, jacket and a cap.

Me: dark cords, sweater and a sexy smile. We rode the elevator down together.
Hit me up if you want to grab a bite sometime

I had on an orange jumper and flip flops

Friday, February 1, 2008



palette cleanser

(theme song first kiss- 8th grade prom)
(and such calves!!)

mean (finish that thought)

DWF looking for the rigth one - 49
(I have no business posting this but cmon)

I'm a new soul... - 26

(coming out of your stomach)

"A girl walks into a lesbian bar...” - 22

(and knocks over three chairs)

the jOhnny seeks :) - 24

(a haircut)

cats (gay)

However, in the spirit of fair play, I invite you to explore the collected evidence yourself and arrive at your own conclusions as I continue to groom my cats, fit them for knit slacks, and ask myself, “Does that make me gay?"

world puppet theater

From NicFit in 'Depressed, Estranged Spouses Find Stability in Virtual Fantasy World':
"Yeah, these people are such nerds spending hours a day interacting with people they don't know in some stupid virtual community.
By the way, do you still love me Super Goddess?"

snow dog

zoe after a pretty intense snow cookie session


'Vote Republican. You can wreck a country in 8 years, but it takes 12 years to kill it’


dj's (i want one)