Thursday, December 31, 2009

napoli pizza

poker chat

timmy0017: u dont get it
timmy0017: im done with this conversation
blitzen_99: no- I won't
timmy0017: yah, you wont get it
blitzen_99: cause you pushed aces after the flop?
timmy0017: i think u are a genius
timmy0017: hitting a 1 outter
timmy0017: had too *** brains
timmy0017: u dont get it
timmy0017: this is obvious
blitzen_99: gl dude
blitzen_99: push aces pre
timmy0017: biggest ***ing luck sack
blitzen_99: not post
timmy0017: u call that
timmy0017: insta call that
timmy0017: pre
timmy0017: so same result
blitzen_99: me?
blitzen_99: naw
timmy0017: even worse for me to see it
timmy0017: ur a ****** then
timmy0017: and wont win
timmy0017: u fold 1010
timmy0017: u will lose
timmy0017: simple
blitzen_99: I hope you get aces three more times
timmy0017: me too
blitzen_99: you will play them correct maybe once
blitzen_99: and I will have folded
timmy0017: u are delerious
blitzen_99: so- yeah
timmy0017: you have no idea about any poker concepts
blitzen_99: bone up on aces
blitzen_99: email your book
blitzen_99: I need this
timmy0017: dont make me stats ur - profit bud
timmy0017: quite clear
timmy0017: i know u are horrible
blitzen_99: my stats say I **** around and get drunk
timmy0017: dont need to continue exp^laining myself
timmy0017: yah smart
blitzen_99: doesn't mean I won't smoke your pale ***
timmy0017: get drunk and spend money
timmy0017: smart brains
blitzen_99: big dollars
timmy0017: yah
blitzen_99: I live for this
timmy0017: nice life
timmy0017: no kids
timmy0017: no wife
timmy0017: complete loser
blitzen_99: ha- very close
blitzen_99: I have a dog
timmy0017: its fine ghetto boy
timmy0017: keep living the high life
blitzen_99: supa ghetto
timmy0017: u know where its at
timmy0017: get drunk
timmy0017: and spend ur cash
blitzen_99: hitting the club later w/ my chains
timmy0017: ur such a thug
blitzen_99: gangster for life
blitzen_99: done?
timmy0017: its fine
blitzen_99: is this the best tillonsburg has to offer?
timmy0017: u know ill be 40k in 15 minutes
blitzen_99: get kwazy
timmy0017: shhh
timmy0017: its poker time
blitzen_99: k
Dealer: TOP THAT 1, it's your turn. You have 14 seconds to act
Dealer: EddieKGB23 has two pair, Tens and Fours
Dealer: timmy0017 has a pair of Tens
Dealer: Game #37439862478: EddieKGB23 wins pot (6,387) with two pair, Tens and Fours

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

body art

I have a slight impression of a grade school cement playground on the back of my skull.
I don't show this to just any girl.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

karoake bitch

These are my top karaoke songs (if I did karaoke (and if it wasn't a rap fest)):
Lou Rawls - "You'll never find". (I used to sing this all the time to the manager at the vid store I was a bike messenger at in college)
Tom Jones - "It's Not Unusual". (classic)
Johnny Cash - "Burning Ring of Fire". (I think my rendition convinced my wife to marry me)

I nail all of them in my head and I've especially NAILED Tom Jones's dancing.
In fact, I will for now on, dance just like my hip is slightly broken with the Tom Jones stiff swagger. ITS VERY SEXY.

What would be better still (and I don't actually do karaoke to know if anyone's done this) is to stage a fakey karaoke reunion.
The way this works is- one person goes out and starts a song (THAT'S REALLY A CLASSIC DUET).
And then part-way thru and with much fanfare, the other person jumps stage for the duet part halfway thru AS IF it's completely spontaneous.
Think Sonny and Cher reunion w/ "The Beat Goes On".
The audience will weep. If you are Cher ready contact me!! I have a suede 'Bono' jacket but I'll buy a white one if the situation calls for it. I just sort of assume every chic has a pair of white 'kiki' boots.