mean (finish that thought)

I am awesome - 30


(but my friend isn't)

I would love to have…………. - 45


(a bigger picture)

Absolutely NO fear of commitment - 30


(haiku-kinda)
and sometimes
life throws punches
sending you reeling
and yeh
i'm sure afterwards i'll be stronger
but maybe i'm just tired
(i am)
of being strong
let alone going it alone
who wouldn't want consistency
support
teamwork
and romance
all built upon
someone who really is
your best friend
besides life changes
the media
(media sucks)
and our society
doubles down
(gambler)
and reminds me
with the looming presence of valentines day
(grim reaper)
i want to be able to say
"i love you"
(ew)
and feel it when i say it
have it returned
and feel appreciated
i've posted before
and it seems
what i desire
still eludes me
(ditched)
and why do i resort to posting
because my life is damn busy
working full time
grad school full time
PLUS i'm kinda over the bars and parties
don't value drinking
but value quality company
leaving me with my circle of friends
and there are no dating possibilities for me there
(they know me)
in thirty years of life
i've learned a lot of qualities
i want or prefer
in a relationship
and women
(optional)
as well as facets i don't like or want
as far as physical goes
(no six toes)
i've found no predictive factor
and have swooned after MANY types of women
don't look like my mother or sister
don't have more than one chin
(losing me)
and at least have moments where you believe you can be attractive
qualities
well
i'll mention a short list
of deal breakers
-no smoking (pot or regular)
-no drugs (alcohol is ok just don't be a lush)
-no cat (don't dislike, just allergic)
-oh and don't have other guys, adding me as just one more to chose from
why?
i only want one person romantically
i am stubborn
(and weird)
accountable
reliable
consistent
strongly value communication and a lot of it
very open and honest
a total cheese ball
(big finish)
love music, books, my dog, and my job
truthfully
i'm far to cynical
to believe i'll find "the one" on here
and partially doubt i'll get a reasonable response
(no)
and each time i tell myself
it's the last time
but somehow
putting out a tiny bit of sincerity
and effort
(bring it back)
makes me feel just a tad less lonely
and just maybe
i'll have a smile later tonight
take care
(nuff said)